Everyone wants to forgive, forget, and leave their past behind for a better future, but then one might wonder, “Why should I always be the bigger person when it was not even my fault to begin with?” 99% of the time, these thoughts are bound to appear if you think about it, proving that you are human enough to feel guilty about it, but the rest, 1%, are unbothered to even think about it, let alone overthinking.
Forgiveness is often seen as a noble and virtuous act, but it is also a notable journey that leads to personal and communal healing. This blog will delve into how this act can lead to better well-being in all aspects, even when you are at rock bottom. Sometimes, you just need to put yourself first and keep aside all the intrusive thoughts that can successfully bring your offender down.
Concept of forgiveness
At its core, forgiveness is the voluntary process of letting go of resentment, anger, and revengeful thoughts against someone who has caused harm to you, emotionally and/or physically. It does not refer to condoning or excusing harmful behaviour, nor does it necessarily involve reconciling with the offender. While it is easier said than done, the pros of forgiveness are known to be beyond the sudden relief of letting go of negative emotions; it promises holistic psychological, emotional, and even physical well-being and importantly teaches you how to forgive betrayal and move on.
The Process of Forgiveness
In this process of forgiveness, it involves several steps:
The first step is acknowledging the pain caused and its impact. This involves staying true to yourself about the pain and allowing oneself to vent rather than bottling all the emotions up. Indeed, it takes time and effort to come to terms with what has happened, and it will take more time to process the associated emotions. It is a journey, and everyone has their own pace for dealing with things.
The next step is making a conscious decision to forgive. This does not mean forgetting or excusing the behaviour but rather choosing the option to let go of the negative emotions associated with it.
The third step is to work on understanding and analysing the offender’s perspective, as there are always two sides of a coin. This involves empathy and trying to see the situation from their point of view. Remember, this does not justify their actions, but it can help you gain a perspective and understand the reasons behind their behaviour.
After all the cards fall into place, the final step is to release the rage and anger you have contained in yourself all this time , because it is important to know how to trust again after betrayal, so you can out various methods such as journaling, therapy, or even meditation, which are considered quite helpful.
The many benefits
Psychological well-being
The psychological benefits of forgiveness are universally known and experienced. Holding onto anger and vengeful thoughts can lead to nothing but problems for you, which involve chronic stress, anxiety, and depression. These negative emotions can cloud your view judgment, disturb decision-making, and, most importantly, limit your personal growth. By choosing the option to forgive, individuals can escape negative emotional states. Research has even shown that those who practice forgiveness visibly show higher levels of happiness, life satisfaction, and overall psychological well-being
Healing in terms of emotions and relations
Forgiveness also plays a vital role in emotional healing, especially when someone is hurt by the opposite’s actions; it is quite the human tendency to feel betrayed, sad, or angry. If left ignored, these emotions can create a cycle of negativity that affects all aspects of life, including relationships with your loved ones. Forgiving someone can ultimately break this cycle, allowing individuals to heal emotionally and rebuild their sense of trust, faith and security.
In relationships, forgiveness can help you form stronger bonds and outlast effective communication in the long run. Moreover, it encourages empathy and understanding between you and the other individual or a group, as both parties can acknowledge the hurt and work towards healing. This process not only deepens relationships but also makes them more resilient and fulfilling.
Physical well-being
Amusingly, forgiveness can also have palpable benefits for physical health as well. Chronic stress and anger issues have been linked to various other health issues, including high blood pressure, high chances of heart disease, and poor immune systems. By reducing these negative emotions via forgiveness, individuals can improve and attain better physical health. Studies have even found that those who forgive have lower stress levels and better heart health, resulting in a more robust immune system.
The many challenges
Forgiveness is not always easy, and there can be many challenges along the way. One prominent obstacle that one may face is the belief that forgiving someone means condoning their behaviour or allowing them to hurt you again, but it is quite the opposite.
When you understand that changing the opposite person is nothing but going to lead you to turmoil and there are higher chances that it will all just go in vain, then the only option that is left is to understand that forgiveness is about personal healing and does not necessarily need to involve reconciliation. Another struggle is the fear of being vulnerable or feeling weak by forgiving. However, forgiveness is a sign of strength and bravery to stand for yourself even if it means to keep your own ego aside, as it takes inner resilience to let go of the deep hurt and anger you should be letting out, but it is quite inhumane if you let your intrusive thoughts win. Hence, the motto ‘Forgive and forget’.
Modern problems require modern solutions
In today’s fast-paced and often advanced world, the need for forgiveness is more necessary than ever. Social media and direct but still indirect communication have heightened the number of conflicts and misunderstandings, making it easier to hold grudges and spread negativity more than ever, especially among the younger generations. But by embracing forgiveness, individuals can take a step back from not falling for this trap and rather contribute to a more considerate and understanding society.
Forgiveness is one of the many steps that does not show you are weak; even if you are at a higher authorial position, it does not seem like you are bowing down but showing that you are a human after all. Therefore, forgiveness can play a major role in addressing more significant societal issues, such as racial and social imparity across the world. While significant changes regarding many issues are necessary, this one step can help individuals and communities heal from past traumas and work towards a more inclusive and genuine future which involves knowing how to regain trust.
Conclusion
Everyone makes mistakes, and the first step is acknowledging it. Forgiveness adds in as a second-most powerful and transformative process that helps in personal healing and a better mental health status at the end.
It offers psychological well-being and emotional and physical benefits and is a key component in building stronger relationships and fostering a more compassionate society. While the process is time-consuming and can be challenging, by choosing to forgive, individuals can free themselves from the burden of rage and anger, paving the way for a more peaceful and healthy life.
